What is it about lingerie that entices us and titillates us so? For a woman, it can make her feel sexy and desired, in control and empowered. For a man, watching a woman clad in lingerie, hinting at what is hidden carries an erotic charge, more so than nudity ever could. Lingerie showcases a woman’s body and suggests what is hidden underneath: the essence of lingerie’s seductive power lies in its suggestive qualities.
As a man, shopping for lingerie can feel like entering a minefield. Some men make the mistake of confusing the opportunity with a second Halloween. Making the short-sighted error of buying lingerie for their personal gratification, instead of hers.
Understanding your lover’s shape will guide the rest of your decision-making. While no two bodies are the same, take these groupings as your starting point, not your end-all-be-all.
SLENDER – Kate Moss
For a small bust, low cut and wireless bras look amazing. An underwire bra can offer some lift. To avoid offending her, steer clear of padding which may give her the idea you don’t like her small breast size. As for the bottoms, she can wear both low-rise and high-rise, thongs or briefs. Think about what cut she normally wears and stick to that!
ATHLETIC – Cameron Diaz
A plunging neckline will add femininity while cheeky bottoms will show off her toned butt. She can also pull off low rise thongs and briefs but probably prefers to avoid high-waisted ones if she has a straight rather than defined waist. If her bust is on the small side, you can opt for flirty wireless triangle bras. Otherwise, a bra with an underwire will give her some lift and cleavage.
HOURGLASS – Kim Kardashian
The bigger her chest the more support she needs so make sure the bra you select has a good underwire or wider straps. A closed underwire bra will look great on her paired with a low rise thong or brief to show off her little waist.
PEAR – Beyoncé
Full hips look good in bottoms with contrasting side panels or you can go for a thong to highlight her booty. A fun strappy bra will draw the attention up and balance out her frame.
APPLE – Adele
Voluptuous women need more support in the chest so go for bra styles with an underwire and some coverage. For bottoms, mid-rise to high-rise briefs are the most flattering. A bodysuit or negligee are other options as they cover areas she may be self-conscious about while still accentuating her assets.
When you’re trying to figure out her size, you can be sneaky and take a peek at the tags in the lingerie she already owns.
For large busts, focus on bras that offer support with underwire cups that have wider straps. Soft bras, the bras without wires, look especially good on babes with small boobs who don’t require the support of an underwire.
Low-waisted thongs or briefs are especially flattering on slender women. High-waisted bottoms tend to flatter women with small waists and larger hips.
As we previously mentioned, bodysuits can be a good option for women who are a bit more self-conscious about their bodies. There are great, super sexy styles out there that have flattering cuts and look great on most body types. Strappy or sheer bodysuits are definitely special occasion pieces while the ones with more coverage are great for her to be able to wear out of the house as part of an outfit too.
Don’t stray too far away from what she already wears. Women tend to feel sexiest when they feel like themselves, so it’s important to select lingerie that reflects her taste and fits her body type. Lingerie expert Dita Von Teese shares this opinion in a Vogue interview:
“THE GREAT SEDUCTRESSES THROUGHOUT HISTORY ARE WOMEN WHO ARE VERY CONFIDENT IN WHAT THEY’RE DOING, AND THEY’RE DOING IT FOR THEMSELVES. WHEN YOU START DOING ANYTHING FOR SOMEONE ELSE, IT WILL SEEM LIKE YOU’RE DOING IT FOR SOMEONE ELSE.”
If she mostly wears bras with no underwires or padding steer clear of padded and push-up bras. Stick to cuts and fits she likes, with an extra something like lacy details or sexy cutouts.
Do your research and pay attention to what she likes. Lace? Briefs? Thongs? G-strings? Boy-shorts? You want her to feel good so that she wears the lingerie with confidence, the sexiest thing a woman can wear.
Now, colour. The lingerie most often bought around Valentine’s day is red. The lingerie most often returned by women? Red. Although red is super sexy and eye-catching you may want to get her something more versatile for the other 364 days of the year. YOU CAN NEVER GO WRONG WITH BLACK! It’s classic, it’s mysterious, and it suits all skin tones.
But by all means, if she's fiery and bold, red might just be what your firecracker needs!!
[FABRIC / QUALITY]
Take a look at the structure, fabric and stitching of the bra. It should feel good to the touch. This is the closest garment to a woman’s body so you want it to be comfortable. Also, make sure there isn’t more than 20% elastic/spandex: extra stretchy fabrics tend to stretch out, lose their shape and fall apart.
Typically a matching set is a good way to go and especially nice when you complete it with accessories like garters and thigh highs. For a set of bra and bottom, I don’t think you can go below a hundred dollars and find something of high quality. But you don’t need to be spending insane amounts either.
Depending on what you are looking for, is it something for one time only? Something that will last her and that she will be able to wear often? You don’t necessarily need to spend a fortune. Luxury lingerie (which can cost around 300$ for a bra and 150$ for a thong) is often made with high quality but delicate lace which means you may not get the most use out of it and will have to be more careful which kind of takes away some of the fun! I recommend going for something mid-range, classic, sexy but wearable. You can expect to spend a little less than 200$ for a good quality bra and bottom.
With lingerie, there are no universal don’ts. It depends what she’s into. If you’re unsure, we suggest sticking to more classic, lacy styles in black. You can’t go wrong with black; it flatters all body types and has a seductive quality.
You can also take more risks if you have been together for a longer time. I wouldn’t recommend getting crotchless or open back panties for someone you’ve been dating casually, but it could be a fun way to spice things up in the bedroom if you’re looking to dive deeper and explore.